With the summer movie season fast approaching TheJay.com will be going into blockbuster movie critique mode for a while. But before I do, I wanted to touch base in the world of television. May sweeps are just around the corner; the TV playoffs, where each show makes the final push for ratings gold. It’s also the time when networks begin announcing which shows will get renewed, and which get the axe. Right now there are slightly more than twenty shows that are on the bubble; they could go either way, depending on what type of mood Jeff Zucker or Les Moonves is in. I want to examine those bubble shows and decide whether or not they are worthy. After all, the networks don’t choose which shows to bring back, the viewers do. So let’s dive right in…
The Case Against: 25 Shows on the Bubble (in alphabetical order):
American Dad
I know FOX likes their animation domination block so much, but American Dad is not worthy enough to follow in the tradition of The Simpsons, Family Guy and King of the Hill. The jokes are more derivative than Family Guy, but not nearly as funny. And moreover, why do we need this when we have the far superior Family Guy? Dump it, and bring back Futurama.
Verdict: BIG FAT CANCEL
Arrested Development
This is just frustrating. Showtime was ready to do the deal and then creator Mitch Hurwitz says no and cancels the show. I don’t understand. You create what is widely considered the best show on television, you generate a rapid, ultra-loyal fanbase and then just when the show was going to get the home it needed to be a sensation, you pull the plug. Why? Why walk away from greatness? There better be something more to this than money. Hurwitz better have a good reason, or the next time he develops a TV show none of his Arrested fans will watch.
Verdict: SOMEBODY CONVINCE HURWITZ TO LET SHOWTIME HAVE IT!
Commander in Chief
At some point you just have to shoot the dying horse. You can’t keep watching it twitch on the ground, helplessly clinging to a life it can’t lead. Commander has already lost two show runners, most of its writing staff and the majority of it’s audience. It was a good concept, but with bad execution and even worse show management. ABC, please, cut your losses, cancel the show and give the timeslot to a worthy pilot.
Verdict: CANCEL (and merciful death)
Courting Alex
CBS took this off the air after only a few airings, but have not yet dropped the official axe. Jenna Elfman is a mediocre comedienne at best, but makes a fine TV actor for people who like their sitcoms stale, predictable and safe as a Mormon girl on prom night. The Eye tends to stick with safe sitcoms, as evidenced by their awkward faith in that horrible new Elaine Benes show, and the unbelievable six-year run of The King of Queens. I say give it the boot and give the time to another CSI show. Maybe this one gets set in, like, Wisconsin, and headlined by Jeff Daniels or Dylan McDermott.
Verdict: CANCEL
Everwood
This is the only real unfortunate casualty of the WB / UPN merger. Everwood is a good, wholesome drama that appeals to the family demographic that the WB was able to pull in by pairing it with the departing 7th Heaven. Unfortunately, The CW is pushing for a teen and urban demographic and has no desire to push the fam angle. The show’s only hope is to nail the finale, pray for a ratings bump and hope Treat Williams has enough goodwill to last through the launch of the new network. Although I doubt it, after all, he was in Deep Rising.
Verdict: CANCEL
E-Ring
Why keep this troubled show when The Unit is so much better and has a network that actually supports it. NBC beat the hell out of E-Ring, continually moving the timeslot, giving it a short-shrift marketing push and allowing the producers to call the show E-Ring (Just an awful title. Even something as stupid as Pentagon Wars would have been better). This was a botched operation from the beginning; a major blunder by NBC who needs to keep Benjamin Bratt in their stable. He will crush a TV series eventually, so you gotta keep him around until he finds his House or Medium. Also, don’t cast Dennis Hopper unless you’re going to let him be a villain. Any other role and you’re just kidding yourself.
Verdict: CANCEL
Four Kings
I like this show. Having Seth Green on my television is always a treat and it was cool to see a “guys” show that let their characters be real “guys”. Yes the three-camera sitcom is a dying art, but Four Kings could have been a last gasp of greatness. NBC used to make their money with the three-camera, so it’s sad to see them abandoning it just because My Name is Earl is popular right now. They better develop something better or the premature axe for this show will seem doubly stupid.
Verdict: RENEW
Freddie
Heck if I don’t want to see this show get renewed. Everything in me says not to endorse Freddie Prinze Jr., and yet I like this show. Brian Austin Green rules all and you know I support my 90210 alumni. Freddie works for me because the five minutes I catch while waiting for Lost to start are always filled with two things: a consistent hearty laugh and good times remembering Brian back when he was deflowering Donna Martin. And that’s always good times.
Verdict: RENEW
Free Ride
Never watched it, don’t care about it. I could go either way. But since they have a similar themed sitcom on the air that I do watch (see below), my feeling is to get rid of this one, stop splitting their audience base and throw all the support onto the more promising The Loop.
Verdict: CANCEL
Gilmore Girls
With creator Amy Palladino leaving it doesn’t seem that smart to bring the show back. Like Sorkin leaving The West Wing, Palladino was the heart of the writing staff, creating the language of the show and the voice of the characters. Her departure will mark a period of confusion, exasperated by the move to a new network and the likely understanding that the show will have one farewell season left. So what’s better, having your farewell season tempered by the needs of a network launch, or to go off the air in style, going down with The WB ship, so to speak? If it were me, I’d go out in a blaze of glory.
Verdict: CANCELLATION BY CHOICE
How I Met Your Mother
The buzz is strong on renewal for this one, and frankly CBS would be stupid not to bring it back. It’s the only Monday night sitcom that appeals to people under 30, with the bonus attraction of the show starring both Doogie Howser M.D. and Willow, the nerdy / lesbian / computer whiz / evil supreme witch from Buffy the Vampire Slayer. The show has great potential, a solid cast and consistent laughs. Bring it back and let Doogie loose. The Doogie will not disappoint.
Verdict: RENEW
Invasion
Boring. That’s the problem with this show. I watched the pilot, was not wowed and decided to check out. But now the plot has become so impenetrable that new viewers have to actively campaign for story information. It’s too insular, not dynamic enough and the only reason the show is still around is because Lost is its lead-in. Put on any other night and this show falls faster than Lohan after Mean Girls.
Verdict: CANCEL
The Loop
I don’t know why I like it, but I do. Maybe it’s because the Supertroopers team has their fingerprints all over it. Maybe it’s because Eric Christian Olsen is funny as hell. Maybe it’s because the girls on the show are crazy hot. Or maybe it’s because the show is just flat out funny. This could be the next Scrubs, if only FOX would give it the chance. I got a feeling a cancellation is imminent; after all, this is the same network that canceled the superb Undeclared and the even more superb Parker Lewis Can’t Lose. I say give it one more season to grow and then make a decision. What else does FOX have to put on? They already canceled Arrested Development.
Verdict: RENEW
Love Monkey
The forecast is grim for this Tom-Cavanaugh music dramedy. I think it’s a shame that Jason Priestley is getting canceled twice in two years (this and Tru Calling). I need regular doses of the man who would be Brandon Walsh, or the cheesy drama show lover in me might die. He’s all I have left, and Tori’s antics aren’t making things any better. I only got to see the show a few times (Mostly when I was on the treadmill at the gym. TV is hard to watch on mute. Closed captioning is sorely lacking in comedic timing.), but what I saw I liked. Tom is a worthy TV actor who deserves a good vehicle. The occasional Scrubs guest spot is not enough (especially if Scrubs gets yanked due to Zach Braff’s burgeoning film career). I say bring it back for one last chance, but give the show a time slot it may have a chance to win.
Verdict: RENEW (On the condition of only a 5 episode trial run in a good timeslot.)
Malcolm in the Middle
The show is going off the air, the decision has been made, I just wanted to say my goodbyes to the show. Malcolm ushered in the age of the one camera sitcom, paving the way for the success of Scrubs, My Name is Earl and The Office. I will always be grateful to the show, no matter how infrequent I watched it. Congratulations on a great run.
Verdict: ETERNAL LIFE IN RERUNS
The O.C.
I tried to watch this show a couple weeks ago and not even the awesomeness of Rachel Bilson could keep me interested. No show in recent history has fallen as far creatively as The O.C. I was a rabid fan of the first season and a good chunk of the second season, but now I don’t even recognize it. Ben McKenzie is the most unbelievable high school student since Steve Sanders enrolled in West Beverly High. Adam Brody has become his own self parody. Don’t even get me started on the travesty that is Mischa Barton. And Bilson is headed for big screen stardom, and as such, does not deserve to have her time wasted on the likes of this. I know the show still has their fans, but the best thing executive producer Josh Schwartz can do is not continue to destroy the legacy of the first season and just kill his baby now. It was fun while it lasted, but now it’s just sad.
Verdict: WELCOME TO CANCELLATION, BITCH!
Out of Practice
This is the ultimate CBS sitcom: the cast is somewhat appealing in a plain vanilla way, the writing is only mildly edgy (just enough to keep the median age above 50), and whenever you watch it, you find yourself inexplicably laughing out loud at least once an episode. Plus, any show that gainfully employs Jennifer Tilly can’t be all bad. Let The Fonz and The First Lady have their day in the sun.
Verdict: RENEW
Pepper Dennis
On paper, casting Rebecca Romijn-Stamos-O’Connell and Brooke Burns as sisters is a good idea. On screen, it just looks odd. The producers did realize that Rebecca is a toehead and Brooke is latin, right? Well, if only that were the least of the show’s problems. I watched two minutes and turned it off. I wasn’t the only one. A huge marketing push for this turkey of a show makes me feel like the WB was cutting its losses and clearing its docket for the CW launch.
Verdict: CANCEL
Scrubs
Word has been that Scrubs was going off the air not because Zach had gotten bigger than his TV bridges, but because their deal with NBC was coming to an end and the network has been notoriously fickle about the most excellent comedy. But ABC is apparently coming to the rescue, offering to pick the show up for multiple years and promising to give the show the type of support it has earned over the last five years. And all that is nice and dandy, assuming Zach decides to come back. I think they only have him for one more season before the features finally take hold of him (he has two films due out by the end of the year), so they should cash in while the ante is so low. But whatever they do, they better fix the writing, which has gotten thin and shallow this season. The goofy dream sequences have gotten old, and as much as I love John C. McGinley, I’ve been tuning out his Dr. Cox rants since season three. They got me for one more year, so they better make it good.
Verdict: RENEW (On ABC, with an improved writing staff)
Sons & Daughters
Never seen an episode, but I support it nonetheless. Primetime needs to have an improv show somewhere on the schedule, and producers should rally to support all the fantastic comedians on the show. There’s nothing else like this on television, so canceling it and replacing it with a repeat of Extreme Makeover or some other gratuitous reality show is akin to admitting that ABC wants nothing to do with comedy, and gives it’s support only to mediocre dramas that pull in great publicity because its stars are figurative whores (ahem, Desperate Housewives).
Verdict: RENEW
It just never seemed right setting a Pamela Anderson sitcom in a bookstore. Yeah, it’s campy and all, but really, even at 40, wouldn’t you rather see her running down a beach in slow motion? The girl’s gone to seed, but she’s still Pamela Anderson for god sakes! Even a Pam at 7 is still like a 9.2 on regular girl’s terms. Also, she can’t act, so asking her to deliver jokes seems like an exercise in futility.
Verdict: CANCEL
Supernatural
This show is not going anywhere, trust me. It’s a perfect show for The CW’s demographic, it stars two attractive, popular leads and it’s the only sci-fi show on television. Sure it’s a little amateurish, but then again, so was The X-Files in it’s first season. I’m not saying Supernatural is even a bump on the road to The X-Files, but it’s definitely got promise.
Verdict: RENEW
The Unit
David Mamet writing, Pedro Cerrano starring and a timeslot to beat the band… this is how you launch a new drama. The cast rocks, the action is first rate (for TV) and it’s a breath of fresh air from all the boring procedural shows that have infected primetime lately. Also, I feel bad for Scott Foley. He lost Jennifer Garner to Michael Vartan, then Felicity ended, his own sitcom was canceled, Scrubs wrote his character off and the movies scripts aren’t getting sent his way. He deserves a break and I’m inclined to give him one.
Verdict: RENEW
The West Wing
This one isn’t real because NBC already decided not to bring the show back, but I wanted to drop some knowledge on it nonetheless. Bringing back Rob Lowe was a bit underwhelming, yet at the same time evoked memories of the glory days of seasons one and two. I’m intrigued by what the show would become if it followed the Santos administration, and have a feeling the show would probably return to its roots and focus on the staff instead of on the President and global affairs. Like I said, this is all meaningless, but I started watching the show again a few weeks ago after a two season lay-off and I’m all bummed that my formerly favorite show is going off the air. Deep down I’d like to see the show continue in any form, just to know that it was still there. Kinda like not wanting your ex’s to ever get married, just so you can know the door hasn’t closed, regardless if you ever want to open the door again or not. My only consolation is that Bradley Whitford just signed on to do Sorkin’s new show, so I know I’ll be taken care of in the fall. The Wing may be coming to an end, but the era of Studio 60 on the Sunset Strip has just begun.
Verdict: KEEP AIRING THE RERUNS
What About Brian
This show is like a master class in how NOT to launch a drama at the end of a bad TV season. The cast is uniformly bland, led by the super-bland Barry Watson (who has Helen Hunt head going on). The plot is trite, cliché and wholly unoriginal, but moreover, it was boring. I’ll forgive a show that it trite and clichéd as long as it’s fun to watch (Heck, I do own the first season of The O.C.), but What About Brian has nothing to keep me coming back. Not even good TV-style nudity. Which is the ultimate save for a bad show. You show me the backside of a hot TV actress and you got my TiVo time for at least four episodes.
Verdict: CANCEL
Bangarang!
