First things first…
Melinda…
The writing was on the wall, problem is, nobody was paying any attention to that wall.
You were far and away the best singer of the season. Your journey took you the farthest, and was the most inspirational. Your consistency and goodwill set a gold standard that few contestants will ever (aspire to) match. Your modesty was so all-encompassing it forced cynical online bloggers to recalibrate our snark-o-meters. Your ability to transcend genre limitations and just plain bring it down, no matter the song, drew judges comparisons to the most famous and important female singers of the modern era. Basically, you were the tits. You WERE the Next American Idol.
And yet, here we are, less than eight hours to the finale of American Idol Season Six and the final two contestants are a wee hobbit beat boxer with a sub-standard voice and a giantess kid diva with a huge voice and even huger amount of emotional fakery. Apparently, and this was news to a lot of us, America likes you, they just don’t like like you. And that sucks. I’ll be rooting for you, not that you’re going to need much help. You’re career, much like Jennifer Hudson’s, will be wide-reaching. Your records may not sell Kelly Clarkson numbers, but there’s not a doubt in my mind that your voice won’t still be heard twenty years from now. Frankly, you’re not winning AI is probably a good thing. You’re not shackled to the AI contract, not forced to be their puppet. So go off, cut a great old school diva jam, duet with Tina, cameo on a bunch of TV shows, make the talk show rounds and prepare for what is sure to be a fantastic career. You rocked, Melinda Doolittle, and you made this season a lot easier to watch. For that, I thank you.
And now to the finale…
Jordin will win American Idol. That much is clear. Blake may be the best performer the show has ever seen (and will ever see), but Jordin is clearly the better vocalist, and the vocals always will out in the end. After the shark jumping that was Sanjaya Malakar, the surprise boot of Melinda and the finale presence of a contestant whose main talent consists of spitting in rhythm into the microphone, Season Six needs to end with a big voice. And a big voice they shall get.
I’d like to say that it’s a real competition, but it’s not. American Idol winners are generally graded on five important components, and Jordin wins on every count.
1. Who will the better representative of the show?
2. Who will better represent the legacy of the show?
3. Who will better affect the talent pool for future seasons?
4. Who will put out the more successful debut album?
5. Who fits into the marketplace better?
Let’s take a closer look at these questions, one by one.
Who will be the better representative of the show?
Blake can think on his feet quicker, and is a more hip spokesperson, but Jordin brings the sweetness and sweetness always looks better on conservative television that cleverness. Jordin will bring the big smile, the huge hair and the entirety of her tallness and win over pretty much everyone she encounters. Blake, on the other hand, is a tad more polarizing. Some people get what he’s doing, others find him to be nothing more than a pesky lightbug they’d like to put in a jar and toss into a large body of water.
Further, Jordin can close out the Idol tour with more of a punch. Blake will bring down the house, to be sure, but Jordin will bring the thing home with her huge diva-ness. Climactic notes always make a better show close than fast-paced energy. Note how much more comfortable Jordin was singing the treackly original song last night than Blake. He’s just not comfortable standing sill and relying on his emotional voice. Plus, if he wins that means the end of the concert goes LaKisha, Melinda, Jordin. We’re gonna need a break between that many divas.
Jordin will also look better in the opening credits of the show, and on the audition murals in the first 10 weeks. Having to see Taylor freaking Hicks soul patrol over the opening credits has been like a reoccurring nightmare I just can’t seem to shake. As much as I like Blake, Jordin will be the better antidote to the Hicks. And I suspect the producers agree. Blake has a bit of Taylor in him, in the sense that he has a larger potential to fail. Jordin’s voice and youth will help propel her initial sales, but Blake’s CD is going to be solely dependent on leftover goodwill. Jordin has the upside, which is why she’s the better representative of the show.
Who will better represent the legacy of the show?
American Idol is known for its women, plain and simple. Kelly, Fantasia, Jennifer Hudson, Carrie. They more closely represent the purpose of the show, and they’re what 19 Entertainment prefers to market. Female voices are more memorable than males’, and tend to last longer in the marketplace and public consciousness. Solo male artists are harder to sell, are more difficult to keep popular and are wholly dependent on the changing trends in the industry (just look at Michael Jackson, who couldn’t handle the rap upswing of the late 80’s, or Usher, who was forced to move from R&B to rap/hip-hop, though with a bit more success than MJ). Taylor and Ruben have been flameouts for Idol, as have Bo Bice, Justin Guarini, and Elliot Yamin. While I think Blake is better than all of them (save Bo), I’m not so sure he can break the spell. If you had to bet all your money on which one will still be relevant in a decade, who would you choose? Purely on what has come before, you have to go with Jordin.
Who will better affect the talent pool for future seasons?
This is almost a toss up, but Blake loses because his side has a higher annoyance factor. He’s already opened the floodgates for wannabe wiggers and stupid human trick performers (much like Bo opened the door for “rockers”). I can’t even fathom the level of awfulness that will occur come January should Blake take the crown. Half the auditions will be some moron trying to rap, beatbox, krunk, harmonica or some such other verbal stunt and claim it’s validity based on Blake. Look what happened with all the grey-haired, bad-dancing a-holes that showed up this year to keep the Soul Patrol alive (like the stalker who tried to put gel in Simon’s hair). A win for Jordin will only increase the numbers of naïve, pre-pubescent wannabe divas, which admittedly is just as detrimental as Blake’s crowd, but at least here there’s the potential for a great voice to emerge. Or maybe someone that was inspired by Jordin’s look, and found strength of self because of it. It’s sappy, I know, but American Idol is nothing is not puppy dogs and ice cream. And if you think I’m wrong, tell it to Chris Daughtry, he has a fourth place ribbon he’d like to show you.
Who will put out the more successful debut album?
Both Kelly and Carrie had huge-selling debuts based on their great voices, solid ballads and an engaging take on their respective genres. I see Jordin following suit. I suspect her first record will be a mix of Kelly, OG Christina Aguilera, and a touch of Beyonce thrown in for good measure. She’ll sell like crazy to the tween set and to older woman. Best guess? 2.5 million albums sold.
Blake’s record will be a cornucopia of sound. It’ll be slightly alt-rock derivative, a bit too much JT dancery, but it’ll be catchy as hell (like a Neptunes record). But I don’t know who he sells to. Tweens and young girls will love him because he’s adorable, but guys aren’t gonna back him. I don’t own a Justin Timberlake album and he’s better than Blake, so why would I buy a Blake Lewis CD (and I’m the audience for it). He’ll get tremendous club support, and I can maybe see one or two medium-hit singles, but I can’t see longevity in the record. Best guess? 1.2 million albums sold.
Who fits better into the marketplace?
This basically boils down to what’s selling the most right now. Amy Winehouse, Rihanna, Carrie Underwood, Avril Lavigne, Lily Allen, Xtina, Beyonce, Fergie, Ciara, Gwen Stefani. It’s the summer, and year, of the diva. Now compare that to the notable solo guys in the marketplace right now. Daughtry, Akon, 50 Cent, Robin Thicke. That’s it. If you’re a guy, you need to be in a band. The Fray, Lifehouse, Maroon 5, Plain White T’s, Dashboard Confessional, Snow Patrol, Hinder, Linkin Park. All guy-fronted bands on the forefront of the music industry. Since I don’t see Blake pulling a Daughtry before his first album, I gotta take Jordin to make the bigger splash. She’s an easier fit on MTV, on The Disney Channel, on Nickelodeon and on the bigger internet music sites like iTunes.
I would bet that a year from now I have more Blake Lewis tracks on my iPod, but that Jordin will be a MUCH bigger pop culture force.
So you can see, Jordin is not only the best option for The Next American Idol, but the ONLY choice. Blake will do nothing to help the cause, while Jordin would bring things to the table left and right. It’s been a long, strange season, full of awful singing and detestable contestants. It’ll be nice to see that in the end, a sweet, gregarious, enjoyable singer, with a big talent, wins out.
Best of luck to Blake, and an early congratulations to this year’s American Idol, Jordin Sparks.
Bangarang!
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