They say August is the beginning of the dog days of summer. The time when everything slows down, too tired from the heat to do much of anything productive. Obviously, “they” have never met The Jay (down by the bay). I’m in the middle of a flurry of out-of-nowhere projects that have left me little time to write two-handed celebrity stupidity zingers. But fret not, as I have some big stuff lined up, both for TheJay.com and elsewhere. In the meantime, and with my promise not to bring up “those girls” set firmly in my mind, I thought it might be a good idea to take a step back and try something I’ve been avoiding for some time. A link post. Though I prefer writing long columns about inane pop culture, but without enough time to lovingly craft 2000 word opusi on the proper ways to hate Reese Witherspoon, pointing out some things on the net that I have enjoyed recently proves to be an easier conceit at the moment.

I may do this once a month (maybe on the 1st of every month, call it the Links of the Rent Day, or something MUCH funnier), or I may never do this again. But until my schedule clears, here’s hoping you enjoy some things that have caught my eye.

• Here’s Episode 8 of The Offseason Adventures of Michael Vick, from the damn funny guys over at Kissing Suzy Kolber.

• A great mashup of Lost, House and 24 from esteemed comedy writer (/legend) Ken Levine.

• GOONIES ACTION FIGURES!!!!

• If you can get to the Crazy 4 Cult art show, I highly reccomend it.

• Learn about wine and fight the Oak Monster over at Wine Library TV. Say hi to my boy Gary Vay-ner-chuck while you’re there.

• Televisionary has a great round-up of all the TV panel at Comic-Con.

• You can peep the first two episodes of the great new FX drama Damages (starring hottie Rose Byrne, Sam Malone and a man dressed up as Glenn Close), over at Yahoo TV. By the way, Frobisher is fan-tastic name for a villain. Can’t believe no one’s thought of that before.

• HARRY POTTER SPOILER ALERT!!! Do NOT click on this unless you have finished Deathly Hallows. J.K. Rowling gives us the scoop on all the questions left unanswered from the HP series. A great, thoroughly satisfying chat wrap (I was dying to know the fate of the Malfoys).

• If you aren’t reading Gilbert Arenas’s NBA Blog, you are missing out.

• My older brother first made me read this, and it might be the best present he’s ever given me (I don’t count all the free suplexes and figure-four leg locks he gave me from our old childhood wrestling days. Those weren’t gifts, they wonderful little moments in time that my shrink will use to put his kid through private school.). My favorite line from this piece: “I will treat the valet with contempt and make sure that he knows that I am superior to him in life! I will tell him to “Take it easy on the brakes, Champ”!”

• Ronnie Coleman is ridonkulously ripped. Watch his YouTube clips and cry from your punyness. He has the best catchphrase of all time: “Everyone wants to be a bodybuilder, no one wants to lift this heavy ass weight!” That’s a good motto for life in general.

• McSweeney’s, while more pretentious than a double chai latte, can still occasionally bring the funny. Here’s guest writer and VH1 clip show whore Michael Ian Black’s “Complete Idiot’s Guide To Meeting People More Famous Than You“.

• In what is probably my most anticipated moment from the new Fall TV Season, CBS has put up a Slap Bet Countdown! I can’t wait to see Marshall get his “premature slapulation” revenge by dropping slap number three on the Barnacle (aka “Swarley”). Hopefully Robin Sparkles will be on hand to sing a song for the occasion.

• R.I.P. Harvey Birdman

• Finally, if you haven’t purchased your copy of Monster Squad on DVD yet, then your just a flaming d-bag of suckitude, and I don’t want you bothering coming around here. We don’t take kindly to you non-Monster Squad owning folk. Until you’ve figured out a second way to kill a werewolf, click the red “X” in the corner and be gone.

Bangarang!