I think Jerry Maguire might have been better off shoplifting the pooty.

Yep, still got a ways to go.

THIS ARTICLE on Renee’s extensive pre-red carpet beauty regimen is a must read. It will make you shocked at the insane lengths celebrities will go to stay pretty. Let’s just say the word “sand blasting” is prominently involved, and leave it at that. My favorite part of this whole deal is that Renee goes through so much for her appearance and still ends up looking like the above picture. I’m starting to get the feeling that whatever she’s doing, it’s not working.

Or maybe it’s working exactly according to plan and she’s aiming to look like a more red-faced, batshit crazy Sharon Stone? That could be her thing, who knows. It’s possible she’s always wanting to be a living embodiment of an evil Disney villain. Or a burn victim.

Seriously, can you tell who's who?

But hey, at least she’s smiling. So there IS progress!

More updates on Renee’s Road to Recovery as they come in…

Bangarang!