Osama Bin Joaquin: Explained

A study was released today focusing on the link between uncommon boys names and penchant for a malicious activity. In the study, David E. Kalist and Daniel Y. Lee of Shippensburg University in Pennsylvania found that boys with unpopular names are prone to violence, malevolence and general douchebaggery.

In their own sciencey words:

Also, adolescents with unpopular names may be more prone to crime because they are treated differently by their peers, making it more difficult for them to form relationships,” according to a statement released by the journal’s publisher. “Juveniles with unpopular names may also act out because they consciously or unconsciously dislike their names.

Well. At least we finally have an answer for this:


Though, unfortunately, not for this:

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There is no science that can explain Dane Cook.

Bangarang!

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