A Disaster of Biblical Celebrity Proportions

Ah, a new day! Got a good night’s rest, blogged about Idol, got frustrated over LOST, I am ready to take on this Wednesday. Time to fire up the old lap top, and see what’s going on in the world…

Michael Vick wants to be a Carolina Panther. Fine, whatever. Obama has a clean bill of health. Good, good, reminds to rewatch Dave for the 47th time. The Olympic ratings were up. Terrible coverage, but good for NBC. Let’s see what the celebs are up to…

Leighton Meester doesn’t believe in marriage. Boring. Logan Lerman to be the new Spider-Man. Duh, knew that weeks ago. Shannen Doherty doing Dancing with the Stars for her father. But who are her asymmetrical eyebrows doing it for? Hmm, what’s this link? “Blonde Beauties Captivate At Vera Wang Event” That looks interesting…

/clicks link

Oh no.

OH GOD!

Reese and Renee… together.

It’s all coming true… just like it was foretold.

We’re headed for a disaster of biblical proportions. Fire and brimstone coming down from the skies! Rivers and seas boiling! Forty years of darkness! Earthquakes, volcanoes… The dead rising from the grave! Human sacrifice, dogs and cats living together… mass hysteria!

Everyone just be calm. We all knew this day would come. To your celebrity bombshelters! Good thing I recently stocked up on Diet Ginger Ale, Entertainment Weekly back issues and an 80-hour TiVo filled to the brim with old episodes of Will & Grace!

See y’all in 35 years, when the bitchface radiation cloud clears… somebody please remember to tape Cougar Town for me.

Bangarang!

Bookmark and Share

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *

*

You may use these HTML tags and attributes: <a href="" title=""> <abbr title=""> <acronym title=""> <b> <blockquote cite=""> <cite> <code> <del datetime=""> <em> <i> <q cite=""> <strike> <strong>