It’s a time of reflection for those in the unauthorized celebrity picture business. With Paris now firmly behind bars for the duration of June, Lindsay drying up in a posh suite somewhere in Malibu, Nicole trying to clean up her rep in time for her day in court, Brangelina giving it out for free [...]
Posts under ‘Nicole Ritchie’
Celebrity Tax Deductions
In honor of the most hectic day of the year for crazy, on-the-VT-edge postal workers (too soon?), I dug through the garbage bins of the Beverly Hills branch of H & R Block and found a slew of Celebrity Tax Forms. I’m ommitted a lot of the information (such as Paris Hilton listing her [...]
The 300 Workout As Designed For Celebritards
So everyone is freaking out over this new workout, declaring it to be THE new “in” training method. But little do “they” know that this workout has been around in the top circles of Hollywood for some time now. It’s used for training the manliest of men, but when it was first developed, it was designed for the Young Hollywood tabloid crowd. Yes it’s true; the Spartan training method was first updated to prime the bodies of the dastardliest warriors of our time, the Celebritards. The likes of Paris Hilton, Nicole Ritchie, Lindsay Lohan and former pioneer of the method, Ms. Britney Spears, were the first to successfully complete what has since been dubbed the “300 Clubs Workout”.
Kelly Ripa Gets Botox On Live TV And Other Odd Celebrity Practices
I just read on PopWatch that Kelly Ripa is planning on airing her first Botox injection live on Regis & Kelly. While the EW.com is adamant against watching her to do this, I say what day does it air? I’ve always been intrigued by the inane and sometimes arcane things celebrities will do [...]
Things Overheard: Great Movies, Awesome Phones & The Crazebrity Power Poll
Here are the ten movies I saw in 2006 that totally blew my mind. They might not be the “best” movies of the year (I can’t in good conscience say that Jackass Number Two is a “better” movie than Letters From Iwo Jima or Little Children), but each of them entertained, provoked and intrigued me beyond measure.
Things Overheard: Nicole Drives, Eragon Tanks and KT Tunstall Is Totally Tuttle
THINGS THAT NICOLE RITCHIE COULD HAVE DONE THAT WOULD HAVE BEEN WORSE THAN DRIVING STONED, AND THE WRONG WAY, ON THE 134
1. Backing into a police car while freebasing, with one hand tied behind her back.
2. Drop a female deuce in the community pool and then blame it on the Snickers bar she eat at lunch and [...]
Britney Files For Divorce, And Other Things That Are Completely Inevitable
The only surprising piece of news that accompanied the announcement that Britney was finally dropping Kevin on his wife-beatering, bad-rapping, overly virulent sperm-having, lame, dumb-ass was that it took so freaking long to happen. I was astonished it took two years, two poor kids, six tons of Cheetos and stock options in Marlboro Lights for the former pop star hottie to realize she had made a mistake.
Actresses Who Need To Get Naked (to improve their careers)
This weekend brings us The Prestige, a flick about dueling magicians, as well as being yet another in a string of movies this year to star the dewy blonde fleshpot, Scarlett Johansson. And while many people will be going to see Batman and Wolverine duke it out to see who gets to kill David Blaine’s great-great grandfather, an even greater number of people will be going for one simple reason: to see if Scarlett finally, at long last, gets naked. Well, I’ll save you all some time. She doesn’t.
Other Celebrities Who Hate A Group Of People
What I was more surprised about was why the media has up till now chosen to ignore this pervasive form of hate-mongering. That being “Celebrities Who Hate A Group Of People”. I did some digging into this rising trend of bigotry and found some surprising results.
Tearful Celebrity Apologies
Wouldn’t you like Lindsay better if she just admitted to the coke and the anorexia? Wouldn’t you like Colin Farrell better if he just admitted he bangs anyone that so much as blinks at him (male or female)? Wouldn’t you like George Lucas better if he apologized for Jar Jar and the prequels? I know I would.
