BEN AFFLECK: Mr. President, it has been an honor to campaign for you. I truly believe you will bring a new vision to this country. And a return to prominence for our wounded economy. Your passion for change, and confidence in the American people’s ability to bring about that change, is inspiring. [...]
Posts under ‘Ben Affleck’
And Now For A Completely Uninteresting Picture of Ben Affleck
That is all.
*H/T to the EVER vital US Weekly Hot Pics
Bangarang!
Ben Affleck Remembers Dem Good Ole Days…
Yep, I remember dem good ole days.
Back when I was one of them actor folk. Life was pretty chill. Mostly just sat around, drankin beers, playin cards, sleeping with narrow blonde women. Occasionally I did sumdat pretendin stuff.
Money was pretty good. I din’t complain. Just showded up, did my thang, [...]
Will Affleck For Food
Uh, gotta any acting gigs?
Please, anything you have in your pocket, or production office, will do. I promise not to use it on poker tournaments or runs for political office. I just need them to act.
I haven’t acted in a long time and I’d really like to do that again. So anything [...]
Violet Affleck’s List Of Weekly Chores
Apparently, kids are good for more than just foisting your love of Keanu Reeves on them.
If you haven’t heard the remarkable “Celebrity Kid Makes Good” story, let me sum it up for you: Jennifer Garner took her angelic baby Violet to the supermarket; when they got there, Jen accidentally locked Violet in the car. [...]
What $40,000 Gets You With Scarlett Johansson
International screen hottie and budding hack musician, Scarlet Johansson, recently put a date with herself up for auction on eBay. The sham affair is an effort to raise money for the OxFam charity. Some pathetic Britboy actually dropped $40,000 to win the auction. That gigantic sum of money earns him the right [...]
The Wicked Witch of the West Hollywood
Ring around the rosy, a pocket full of spears! Come little one, and I will show you how to make this city bow at your feet!!! I have conquered B-list male boytoys and swindled an Oscar, but now that we have survived our homeland freezing over, my power will be the greatest in [...]
The Only Man You Should Vote For On Super Tuesday!
There’s only one man who can step in and make this country better…
Only one man who will dare to make the hard choices…
Only one man who has saved the world from an asteroid the size of Texas…
And that man is Ben Affleck, your candidate for the next President of the United States!
His Slogan: “He’ll be [...]
The 2007 TheJay.com Year In Film Awards
I’m rip roaring and raring to go on ‘0JAY8 like La Lohan on an extended weekend in Capri, so before a Celebritard does something so dissgrossting that I have to break my Lost Girls ban and dip into my bag of fake whore words to describe their actions (”whoreititude” being my current favs), let’s start [...]
